So, you’ve been listening to “Off the Cuffs” for a while now and you’ve decided to try this BDSM thing that Dick and I keep talking about. You got yourself a FetLife account, went to the local munch, and met someone who wants you to cuff them to your bed, give them a good flogging, and attach clothespins to the sensitive areas on their body. You spend some time negotiating it, and before you know it, the day arrives. You clean your house, set up your toys, put on a fresh pot of coffee, and decide to make a Spotify playlist to set the mood and make it more fun. But what goes on the playlist? “Venus in Furs” by The Velvet Underground, “Get Your Body Beat” by Combichrist, “Master and Servant” by Depeche Mode, and…you’re stuck. Well, don’t worry. Your favorite kink and music nerd podcaster is here to help with some songs you might not have considered, but which fit the broad definition of “kinky”. These are guaranteed to get the toes-a-tappin’ and set the mood perfectly.

1. “Battleship Chains”-The Georgia Satellites

Kinkiest lyric: “You got me tied down with battleship chains”

A raucous southern rock band who released their critical and commercial hit debut approximately ten years after anyone cared about raucous southern rock bands, the Satellites seemed to keep running into women who wanted to control them. They never seemed to mind.

2. “Sweet Dreams”-Eurythmics

Kinkiest lyric: “Some of them want to abuse you. Some of them want to be abused.”

This is the only song on this list you’ve heard before. And you never thought about how kinky it was, did you? Annie Lennox wonders what goes on in everyone’s freaky little imaginations to a cold, droning synth beat.

3. “More”-The Sisters of Mercy

Kinkiest lyric: “I don’t know why you gotta be so undemanding”

We’ve all had that vanilla partner. The goth mainstays in The Sisters of Mercy wrote this one with Jim Steinman (yes, the guy who wrote all those might as well be showtunes Meat Loaf songs). The singer’s partner is an understanding person who treats him well, but he wants…more.

4. “Domestic Violence”-RZA

Kinkiest lyric: The whole song

Tiffany spends one and a half minutes listing all the ways RZA “ain’t shit.” RZA claps back. Tiffany keeps undercutting RZA’s bedroom performance. Verbal humiliation from both sides, Wu-Tang style.

5.  “A Touch of Evil”-Judas Priest

Kinkiest lyric: “I’m so afraid, but I still feed the flame”

I couldn’t leave out rock’s resident leather daddy. This one might be cheating a bit, since it’s overt, but apparently there were Judas Priest fans who were convinced it was about drugs. Sounds to me much more like it’s about being a bottom with a dangerous and scary top you can’t get enough of.

Of course, there’s so many more that I haven’t heard (if such a thing is possible), or completely forgotten about. If you know of any  songs that belong on this list, reach out to me. I might just include them on my next “play” list.