Being more and more in the public eye as I have become increasingly involved with Off the Cuffs, sex work, and blogging has made me think a lot about my gender expression. I identify as cis female but have never really presented traditionally “femme;” flannels and jeans are my uniform. A “tomboy” for most of my life, I find it interesting that the more I explore kink and my own sexuality, the more I want to present as characteristically feminine in the sex-positive spaces I frequent. I think part of the change has been seeing examples of the true diversity of femininity; in such spaces, “femme” is not about one standard look — it’s an attitude, a mindset. The way you present yourself is just part of the greater whole that is self-expression. Being in these positive spaces has made me more comfortable leaning into a more traditionally feminine look, a look that I wouldn’t previously have felt confident pulling off. It’s this change in attitude that I think drew me to the new line of kink and leather accessories by Zalo.
The Doll series of BDSM toys and accessories is one of the most beautiful and crush-worthy sets I have seen. The designs include rose motifs, which fit absolutely perfect with my femdom persona, Sweet Rosette. Zalo was nice enough to send me one of their most interesting pieces, the Rose Ball Gag, a piece I’ve lusted after since the first moment I saw it. When I received it, the luxury aspect did not disappoint; it comes in a nice box and with a soft storage bag. The gag straps are made of real leather and accented with gold parts. The gag itself is made of semi-firm silicone and is actually a standard ball gag with a removable rose in the center. This toy was clearly made for photo shoots; I can’t get over how pretty it is. When I tried it on, it fit rather comfortably, or at least as comfortable as a ball gag can get. The silicone straps prevent any uncomfortable chafing and the removable rose gives you the option to use it as an open hole gag. You can’t fit a phallus (flesh or otherwise) in there, but it’s enough space to do other kinky things like spit or pour any number of liquids down your partner’s throat.
I used this toy as a top recently in a scene that Dick and I did. The premise was a fun one: Boy gets drugged by injection, the drug paralyses him at first and as the paralysis wears off, his mind becomes blank and suggestible. Once his mind is primed, I turn him into my personal sex drone. I cuffed all of his limbs to the bed and put on the ball gag, which looked super cute. Then I “drugged” him (really just injected him with his cholesterol medication) and teased him to “work the drug through his system.” After I fucked with him for a while, I learned that the ball gag holds a shoe on his face quite nicely and then as I used his hands for my own pleasure, I told him I had an additional drug to solidify his condition. I pulled the rose out of the ball gag to expose the hole to his mouth and used a dropper to drop a “liquid drug” (water) inside. After getting him off and concluding the scene, I took off the ball gag, which was a relief to him as it was making his jaw quite sore. We are thinking that Dick’s jaw just isn’t into ball gags (not a fault of the gag itself). Well, it was fun while it lasted, anyway.
For myself, I have worn the gag for extended periods of time and haven’t had the same issue. I think it’s as comfortable as a ball gag can be, that is to say it is mildly uncomfortable but that’s…kind of the point. It’s fun to leave the hole open long enough to have drool pool up and drip out. It also just looks so pretty. I am hoping to do a cute photo set with it in the future for my pro-domming persona. I would definitely recommend this toy if you have a bit of money to spend on something real nice and are looking for something functional, beautiful, and versatile.
As far as femininity goes, I can only really speak for myself. I think it’s something I’m still exploring, both what it means and how it fits me and my identity. This rose gag feels like it encapsulates it for me, and not just because of the floral motif. It also captures a feeling of strength and resilience that I don’t often see represented in mainstream versions of femininity. The resolve of a tough bottom, and the stern but gentle direction of a top. All of which I would consider to be absolutely, undeniably beautiful.
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Thank you to Zalo for sending me this toy to review. Please visit their site via my affiliate link here!
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